CoWorker: “Got the job. My last day will be December 28.”
Manager: “On the 28th? When do you begin your new job?”
CoWorker: “January 3rd.”
Manager: “Come on, work until the 2nd then”
CoWorker: “Screw you dude I ain’t working Christmas and New Years, you had to work ALL the holidays this year”
Manager: “If you work those days I’ll buy you some Burger King today”
CoWorker #1: I’ve found a office with super cheap rent for my StartUp.
CoWorker #2: If the view is shit and they don’t have free cookies keep looking!
CoWorker #1: Hey Jim, You’re smart can you help me with something
CoWorker #2: Sure
CoWorker #1 (pulls out kid’s math homework and a reads question from the math homework)
CoWorker on phone: Hold on a minute (presses hold then says to Team Leader). John is on the phone and needs to talk to you
Team Leader: Tell him I’m at lunch.
CoWorker: (back on phone) Hi, he says he’s at lunch
Team Leader: (rage in eyes)