Welcome to Stupid CoWorkers! This website is to vent and laugh about the dumb people we have to work with everyday at our jobs. So, come back daily for a good chuckle. Also, please submit your own stories about the employers, employees, and co-workers at your job!!
03/09/10: Stupid CoWorkers
Operator: See that subject line? How am I supposed to know that that means?
Perturbed developer: You can open it up and read the e-mail.
Operator: Then I'd have to open multiple e-mails.
Perturbed developer: Yes, you can do that. You can open multiple e-mails.
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Perturbed developer: You can open it up and read the e-mail.
Operator: Then I'd have to open multiple e-mails.
Perturbed developer: Yes, you can do that. You can open multiple e-mails.
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03/06/10: Stupid Customers
Me: “Hi, what can I get for you?”
Customer: “Do you have decaf?”
Me: “We do. What size would you like?”
Customer: “Well, I was wondering if I could have half decaf and half regular?”
Me: “Sure thing.”
Customer: “If I do that, which one will be on the top?”
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Customer: “Do you have decaf?”
Me: “We do. What size would you like?”
Customer: “Well, I was wondering if I could have half decaf and half regular?”
Me: “Sure thing.”
Customer: “If I do that, which one will be on the top?”
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03/02/10: Stupid CoWorkers
CoWorker car prank...
02/28/10: Stupid Customers
Customer: “Hi, I need to get a refund for this book. You gave me the wrong book.”
Me: “Didn’t you ask for Dracula?”
Customer: “No! I read this book and it is nothing like the movie.”
Me: “Actually, Francis Ford Coppola completely re-wrote the story when he filmed his version of Dracula. I can help you find that version, if you’d like.”
Customer: “No! I want the Van Helsing version.”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Customer: “Yeah, in Van Helsing, Van Helsing is the main character and he fights Dracula and Frankenstein.”
Me: “That film is a complete work of fiction. Van Helsing never fought Frankenstein or Frankenstein’s monster.”
Customer: “Yes he did! The movie said so! What do you know?”
Me: “Bram Stroker was a little boy when Mary Shelley died, so she never read Dracula.”
Customer: “I think you are lying. The movie and Hugh Jackman would never lie!” *storms off*
Customer #2: *overhearing* “I hate Hollywood.”
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Me: “Didn’t you ask for Dracula?”
Customer: “No! I read this book and it is nothing like the movie.”
Me: “Actually, Francis Ford Coppola completely re-wrote the story when he filmed his version of Dracula. I can help you find that version, if you’d like.”
Customer: “No! I want the Van Helsing version.”
Me: “I’m sorry?”
Customer: “Yeah, in Van Helsing, Van Helsing is the main character and he fights Dracula and Frankenstein.”
Me: “That film is a complete work of fiction. Van Helsing never fought Frankenstein or Frankenstein’s monster.”
Customer: “Yes he did! The movie said so! What do you know?”
Me: “Bram Stroker was a little boy when Mary Shelley died, so she never read Dracula.”
Customer: “I think you are lying. The movie and Hugh Jackman would never lie!” *storms off*
Customer #2: *overhearing* “I hate Hollywood.”
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02/25/10: Stupid Things Overheard
Advisor #1: Wow, you're really almost done packing up your office. All the rainbow stuff is gone...
Advisor #2: I never had any rainbow stuff up. It was just colorful.
Advisor #1: True. It's like the party's over.
Advisor #2: Yup. The make-up's off. My hair's messed up... Can't find my underwear.
Advisor #1: Wait, how is that different from any other day?
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Advisor #2: I never had any rainbow stuff up. It was just colorful.
Advisor #1: True. It's like the party's over.
Advisor #2: Yup. The make-up's off. My hair's messed up... Can't find my underwear.
Advisor #1: Wait, how is that different from any other day?
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02/22/10: Stupid CoWorkers
02/19/10: Stupid CoWorkers
Male sales rep, about client meeting: So, I heard you were out with a bunch of guys.
Female sales rep: Yeah, four of them!
Male sales rep: Wow, you need a towel?
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Female sales rep: Yeah, four of them!
Male sales rep: Wow, you need a towel?
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02/16/10: Stupid Customers
Me: “Thank you for calling [video rental store]. How can I help you?”
Caller: “Have you seen District 9?”
Me: “Yes, I have. Do have questions about it?”
Caller: “Is this some sort of Australian joke?”
Me: “I beg your pardon?”
Caller: “All this movie has been is interviews with government people and aliens wearing brassieres! Am I watching some weird special feature or is this some kind of Australian joke?”
Me: “Well, the movie is in a documentary style and that definitely sounds like the beginning of the movie. If you want, you can come down to the store and exchange it for no charge.”
Caller: “Thank you very much. Those Australians have a weird sense of humor, man. I should know…I used to be married to a Brit and they’re strange, too!”
Me: “All right, sir you have a good night.”
Caller: “OK. I will put in a decent movie now which is not an Australian joke.”
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Caller: “Have you seen District 9?”
Me: “Yes, I have. Do have questions about it?”
Caller: “Is this some sort of Australian joke?”
Me: “I beg your pardon?”
Caller: “All this movie has been is interviews with government people and aliens wearing brassieres! Am I watching some weird special feature or is this some kind of Australian joke?”
Me: “Well, the movie is in a documentary style and that definitely sounds like the beginning of the movie. If you want, you can come down to the store and exchange it for no charge.”
Caller: “Thank you very much. Those Australians have a weird sense of humor, man. I should know…I used to be married to a Brit and they’re strange, too!”
Me: “All right, sir you have a good night.”
Caller: “OK. I will put in a decent movie now which is not an Australian joke.”
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02/13/10: Stupid Things Overheard
Supervisor #1: Hey, want to go to a party? John Phillips invited me to some KU thing.
Supervisor #2: Who's John Phillips?
Supervisor #1: He's an asshole.
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Supervisor #2: Who's John Phillips?
Supervisor #1: He's an asshole.
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02/10/10: Stupid Things Overheard
Female coworker: What did you bring me from El Salvador?
Make coworker: Nothing. I used all my money for sex.
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Make coworker: Nothing. I used all my money for sex.
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