Stupid CoWorkers

Cubicle Girl: I heard she lost custody because she injected her kid with Botox for all those beauty pageants she attends.

Cubicle Guy: What? Botox? I bet her daughter didn’t look surprised at all.

Stupid CoWorkers

FedEx comes in for our company’s delivery.

FedEx guy: Here are your packages.

Secretary: Are you looking at my twins? (referring to photo of twin daughters)

FedEx guy: Um uh ne erm ver, I got to go!

Stupid CoWorkers

CoWorker to customer on telephone about pork recall at our business: We only were recalling pork dated March 4th through March 16th.

Customer: Mine is dated April 2nd. Can I eat it?

Phone Support Guy: Yes sir. That’s not in our recall dates.

Customer: Are you 100% sure it is safe?

Phone Support Guy: Yes sir. That pork wasn’t part of our recall.

Customer: What are the dates again?

Phone Support Guy: March 4th through March 16th.

Customer: So, it won’t kill me?

Phone Support No sir, unless you plan on throwing it on the floor, jump on it a few times, then licking it up and eating it raw.