Stupid Laws

Stupid Laws in Colorado…

One may not mutilate a rock in a state park.

Car dealers may not show cars on a Sunday.

It is illegal for liquor stores to sell food or grocery stores to sell any alcohol except beer that is at most 3.

No liquor may be sold on Sundays or election days.

It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.

Tags may be ripped off of pillows and mattresses.

Stupid Criminals

Announcing the sale of pot out of a dorm room window is probably not a good idea when two police officers are within hearing range.

A pair of former Northeastern University freshmen are facing drug and other charges after prosecutors said one of them leaned out his dorm window on Sunday and loudly told a woman in the dorm opposite his that he and his roommate were selling pot.

Two plain clothes Boston officers in the building overheard the conversation, made their way up to a second floor dorm room where they arrested Michael Emery, 18, of Haverhill and Matthew Ferrante, 18, of North Andover after finding about four ounces of marijuana, drug paraphernalia, including a scale, and several bottles of alcohol in the room, the Suffolk district attorney’s office said.

Stupid Students

Stupid School Excuses (from parents)

Misspellings have been left intact.

I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because don’t know what size she wear.

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Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday we forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday we thought it was Sunday.

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My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the marines.

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Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

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Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

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Gloria was absent yesterday as she was having a gangover.

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Please excuse Brenda. She has been sick and under the doctor.

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Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat ; her brother had a low grade fever and ached all over. I wasn’t the best either , sore throat and fever. There must be something going around, her father even got hot last night.

Stupid Criminals

DE QUEEN, Ark. – A ruse worked for a De Queen man who used his brother’s name after being picked up for another drunken-driving charge until he called his brother and asked him to bail him out of jail.

Police said an officer arrested Sebastian Nabor, 28, early Sunday after the car Nabor was driving hit a curb. When Officer Ernesto Echevarria smelled alcohol and found an open container of beer in the car, Nabor gave his name as Antonio Moreno Nabor.

The suspect failed a field sobriety test and a breath test showed a blood-alcohol level of 0.11 percent, above Arkansas’ legal limit for drivers of 0.08 percent.

Nabor was charged with driving while intoxicated and called his brother to bail him out. As the paperwork was being processed, officers realized the arrested man had given the wrong name.

Sebastian Nabor was also charged with criminal impersonation.

“Everybody tries it. People give us false names in case warrants of arrest have been issued or they owe other fines,” De Queen Police Chief Richard McKinley said.