Stupid CoWorkers

September 20, 2006

For two years now I have been working in the offices of a cleaning company.

The two directors are married and met about twelve years ago. He used to be a director of another company and she used to be the cleaner!

Cut a long story short, they got together and started up their own company.

He wants to build an empire whilst she is quite happy to keep things small and do the odd cleaning job.

So, the two directors seem to be pulling in two different directions, which makes their marital life quite eventful!

He loves women – although women don’t love him. She is extremely possessive and jealous.

I get caught in the middle of their slanging matches and they often run each other down to me. The professionalism, or lack of it, is beyond believe. I want to scream DIVORCE at them both! Up to now I have managed to keep my opinions to myself and just nod in a sympathetic way whenever they wish to vent their frustrations.

I am an attractive girl so I have to put up with suspicious eye balling from the woman and even received a phone call at home around 10pm one night – her husband had gone out on his motorbike and she thought he was with me!!!!! The thought makes my stomach churn!

Moral of the story: DO NOT WORK FOR A MARRIED COUPLE!

Stupid CoWorkers
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Your Superhero Co-workers

August 21, 2006

The Riddler: You never really understand this type of co-worker. Sometimes he’s nice, sometimes unfriendly, sometimes knowledgeable, and sometimes dumb. The Riddler smokes and drinks and eats, but so irregularly that you wonder if he’s a smoker, or a drinker (or an eater).

Invisible Woman: The Invisible Woman (pictured below) is largely unnoticed in your office. She’s on the payroll, so everyone understands she’s somehow doing a good job, though no one understands exactly what this job is. Invisible Woman will avoid all after-work socialization, quietly leaving when work is done. The Invisible Woman doesn’t need to call in sick as no one will notice her missing anyway.

The Punisher: The Punisher is usually higher up in the hierarchy as he likes to bully people. When you did something wrong, The Punisher arrives on the scene to make you feel it by use of excessive force. Sometimes, when there’s two Punishers in one office, a no holds barred battle is going to erupt.

Stupid CoWorkers
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Stupid Roommates

May 18, 2006

First of all, let me preface by saying that I am female. My roommate and I had a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship once upon a time, a LONG time ago, but since we hace just become good friends. I needed a place to live, and he invited to live in his extra bedroom of his house. I had never visited the house, but DESPERATELY needed a cheap place, so I accepted.

Upon arrival of my first visit, I discovered that my future room was actually quite similiar in size to a closet. I argued rent price, and got it down to less than half–since my room was less than half the size of his! I moved in in November, and everything was great–for awhile! Enter Crystal–my roommates so-called “girlfriend.”

Now my roommate is 22 years old–his girlfriend, when he started dating her, was still in high school, and not yet 18! After laughing at him when he told me, I discovered he was serious. Now this seemingly healthy relationship progressed, and everything was fine. Then all of a sudden, his little 18 year old is here ALL the time….these two have absolutely no life except for each other. She had no job at the time, but she has one now–about 5-6 months after mooching off him. But when they are not at work, their life consists of sitting around our house–monopolizing the couch which I purchased for use, but not sure I’ve ever actually used–going to Wal-Mart or Target, and going out to eat. Thats ALL. They only hang out with each other, and only do those things. They never pick up after themselves, they mess up the house which I have cleaned, and they like to have early morning sex in tha bathroom that we share, and make loud sounds to wake me up. I’ve exacted revenge, however, by playing the William Tell overture at full volume everytime they start going at it. But with the messiness, I totally understand your pain! They try to throw their empty wrappers and other things away, but the garbage can is just so hard to hit! And its unbelievably tough to wipe up your mess and just soak your dishes in the sink, after I’ve just cleaned the kitchen.

Anyway, thats the gist of my roommate situation. I’m in the process of selling my car so I can move into my own apartment. Thanks again for the amusing, yet oh so true website! Take care!

Sincerely, Beth

Stupid Roommates
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Stupid CoWorkers

April 14, 2006

I am a manager at a family amusement facility. We have people of all ages that work for us. One particular employee is let’s say “not all together there”. She has worked for us for about a year(I would like to say, I didn’t hire her). One afternoon while working our 3 story soft play structure she screams at the top of her lungs” Everybody out, he’s got a knife”. As most of the guests and their children exited it was discovered that a small boy at the top of the play structure had a small 1 inch pocket knife cutting through the netting. This in it’s self is not so unusual except that the child was not trying to hurt anyone, just trying to escape. This same employee was involved in 3 car accidents in one week, one totaling her car. It was just learned that she hit a pedestrian at school. Have you ever seen the movie the cable guy…we are living it! We also do Birthday parties in which groups of kids play in our structure. She will place kids in “time out” for not listening to her. One afternoon we discovered 12 9 year old boys in “time out” behind a small wall about the size of a hall closet. She makes my job quite interesting at times but I wonder if we were not kind enough to hire her where would she work? Not a driving job! I hope.

Stupid CoWorkers
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