CoWorkers #1: Can you help me with this Word document? I want the layout to look horizontal instead of vertical.
CoWorkers #2: Okay, go into File, then Page Setup.
CoWorkers #1: Okay.
CoWorkers #2: You see where it says “Page Source”?
CoWorkers #1: Sure Do.
CoWorkers #2: Good, now do you see where it says “Orientation”? Make your choice.
CoWorkers #1: Gay or straight?
Receptionist: Jim Smith, please come to the office, you have a telephone call.
CoWorker: You may want to speak up. Also, if he shows up, I’m getting out of here fast.
Receptionist: Why, don’t you like him?
CoWorker: No, it’s not that at all, it’s just that he’s been dead for over a year.
CoWorker #1: (On a diet trying to lose weight, but has a big piece of coworkers birthday cake in hand): Did someone over here call me? I thought someone call my name.
CoWorker #2 : No, that’s just your conscience speaking to you trying to stop you from eating that cake!
CoWorker #1: Hey Jim, You’re smart can you help me with something
CoWorker #2: Sure
CoWorker #1 (pulls out kid’s math homework and a reads question from the math homework)