Tech Support: “May I have your area code and phone number please?”
Customer: “92251.”
Tech Support: “No, that’s your zip code; I need your area code.”
Stupid Tech Support
Tech Support: “Hello, tech support, may I help you?”
Customer: (in a thick Russian accent) “Yes. Monitor is working fine but has sparks and smoke flying out back. Is ok?”
Tech Support: (blink)
Stupid Tech Support
Customer: “Your sound card is defective and I want a new one.”
Tech Support: “What seems to be the problem?”
Customer: “The balance is backwards. The left channel is coming out of the right speaker and the right channel is coming out the left. It’s defective.
Tech Support: “You can solve the problem by moving the left speaker the right side of the machine and vice versa.”
Customer: (sputter) (click)
Tech Support: (snicker)
Stupid Tech Support
Tech Support: “Well, sir, in that case I have to cancel the test and try again. So please leave your cable modem on this time.”
Customer: (in a thick Russian accent) “What? You have cancer?”