Stupid Things Overheard

Female coworker #1: You need more man-attention than I do, even!

Female coworker #2: Well, you know Paul is coming over this weekend.

Female coworker #1: Who’s that?

Female coworker #3: Her booty call.

Female coworker #2: Yeah, he’s cool, you should totally call him.

Female coworker #1: Ew! I am not calling your booty call.

Stupid Customers

(Note: I’m selling t-shirts at Comic Con in San Diego. Two men are dressed as Star Wars characters come to my booth.)

Jedi #1: “Man, these shirts are all great. I don’t know how I’ll pick.”

Coworker: “Well, they are two for $35, so you can get any two you like.”

Jedi #2: “Is there any deal for three?”

Coworker: “Nope, just by twos.”

(Suddenly, the second Jedi activates his light-up light saber and speaks in an angry, menacing tone.)

Jedi #2: “How about now?!”

Stupid Bosses

I work in a seniors home so there’s a lot of different staff; nurses, personal health care workers, dining staff, cleaning, maintenance, activities… everyone knows each other and chats when there’s a spare moment, but for some reason my boss just wont let our department mingle with the others. (this is where i think it roots from) She’s always got a ton on her mind, so she tends to be short with people so she doesn’t forget stuff, it doesn’t make her popular.

Stupid CoWorkers

Product development guy: I just got an e-mail in Chinese… What do I do?

Product development gal: Just copy/paste it into Microsoft Word and change the font.

Product development guy: It’s Chinese, not Wingdings.