Stupid Criminals

A 58-year-old unemployed man went into a branch of the Saitama Resona Bank in the town of Kumagaya, north of Tokyo, on Wednesday, intending to rob it, a police spokesman said.

According to local media reports the man first asked a bank teller, “Any idea how you rob a bank?” The teller alerted another member of staff, who asked the man to leave.

“He left quietly when asked to,” the police spokesman said.

However, the staff member escorting the man out of the bank noticed the knife sticking out of his pocket and a bloodstain on his trousers.

Police arrested the man for illegal possession of a weapon.

“He didn’t brandish the knife at anyone … but he injured himself in the leg,” the police spokesman said.

Stupid Customers

Customer: “I’m having trouble installing Microsoft Word.”

Tech Support: “Tell me what you’ve done.”

Customer: “I typed ‘A:SETUP’.”

Tech Support: “Ma’am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.”

Customer: “It says ‘[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk’.”

Tech Support: “Insert the MS Word setup disk.”

Customer: “What?”

Tech Support: “Did you buy MS word?”

Customer “No…”

Stupid Customers

Customer: “I received the software update you sent, but I am still getting the same error message.”

Tech Support: “Did you install the update?”

Customer: “No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?”

Stupid Tech Support

Tech Support: “May I have your area code and phone number please?”

Customer: “92251.”

Tech Support: “No, that’s your zip code; I need your area code.”