Student: “Hey, how do I lodge in to Hotmail?”

Me: “You’ve got to type in your username and password in those fields that say ‘username’ and ‘password’.”

Student: “I don’t have one of those.”

Me: “You need one to log in to Hotmail.”

Student: “It’s ‘LODGE’ in.”

Me: “The term is ‘log in,’ and you can’t log in without a username and password. I can help you create one if you’d like.”

Student: “Um, excuse me, but I THINK I know what I’m talking about. It’s LODGE in, and I don’t want a username and password, I just want to get some email!”

I just went back to working after that, and he left complaining about how “crappy” the computers in the lab were, after trying to “lodge in” for ten more minutes.