Stupid CoWorkers

I used to work for a law firm that was stuck in the 40’s — that’s the only description. We didn’t have a postage meter because the office manager (a 70 year old long-time bookkeeper they had promoted because of her frugal ways) said those just cost money. So each of the 10 secretaries had a little box like for fishing tackle and in it, various denominations of stamps. If you just needed to mail one letter, well no problem there. But I had a case with 167 parties and everything ever filed in it was at least in a large envelope. Every one of those parties got a copy of every piece of paper filed. I would routinely spend an ENTIRE DAY after every filing applying stamps to these large envelopes.

Stupid Criminals

MONROE — A man and woman robbed a busy Starbucks early yesterday morning and wound up serving coffee through the drive-up window for at least 30 minutes to make additional cash. They then waited until business slowed enough to make a getaway.

Neither police nor Starbucks would say how much money the pair made off with.

Police arrested two suspects Tuesday night after trailing their car from the Lake Stevens area to a service station. A witness identified the pair as the barista bandits, police said in a news release.

No one was injured in the early-morning holdup, and no property was damaged, said Jan O’Neil, Monroe police spokeswoman. But the incident was “weird and stressful” for the employees.

Stupid Things Overheard

White teen: Everyone has a MySpace.

Asian teen: I don’t have a MySpace.

White teen: You don’t got a MySpace? Why not?

Asian teen: ‘Cause it’s the easiest way to meet sexual predators.

White teen, laughing: Nah, don’t worry. You ain’t ever gonna meet any sexual predators — you’re ugly.

Stupid CoWorkers

work in a call center for a certain city’s 311 center, on the overnight shift. I spend 10 hours a night sitting at a desk playing webgames and reading e-mail and maybe fielding 9 calls a night… One of my co-workers whom we shall name “Mudbutt” has a little problem… At this point we haven’t established whether it is a femenine or flatulent odor, but it is foul beyond comparison.

Every night she goes to lunch at about 2:30am, and comes back at 3:30am. usually around 3:45 there is a strange stench spreading throughout the office… Now, I can understand a little fart cutting loose every once and a while, but the reek we experience is unholy beyond belief… think of a rotten egg/baby diaper scent… sulphrous and strong, and it doesn’t go away. Basically every ten minutes we get a strong whiff, and this goes on for a few minutes.

We have hinted at the problem, brought out candles (but we can’t burn them) and aerosol scents, etc. Nothing is strong enough to cover it up except perhaps lysol.

The worst part of it is that she laughs at us when we complain. One night she complained of “stomach pains” and we heard a loud noise that sounded like a soft burp, and this fish scent started getting stronger and stronger. I don’t even want to guess what it was, but I did submit a bid for a new shift…