Stupid Customers

Customer: “I don’t want one of those systems based on the cellulite processor.”

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Stupid Customers

I work in a convenience store. A while ago, a woman came in, grabbed a bottle of soda and a candy bar, and came up to the counter. “That’ll be $1.65,” I told her. She looked at me kind of strangely for a moment, then picked up the soda and asked, “How much is this?” “A dollar,” I said. Then she picked up the candy bar. “And how much is this?” she asked.

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Stupid Customers

I worked at a gift store just across a small open area from the world famous Space Needle here in Seattle. Two questions from tourists that never failed to amaze and amuse me were, “Where is the Space Needle?” (Honestly, it only looms 610 feet above your head at this very moment.) and “Is this where I get tickets to the Space Needle?” (No, you get them AT the Space Needle. I was tempted sometimes to send them to some remote corner of the Seattle Center in effort to obtain them. Shame on me.)

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Stupid Customers

I used to work at an Arby’s. In the two years I worked there, the dumbest customer by far has been one that apparently never succeeded at first grade math.

Me: “That will be $12.69, please.”

Him: “Ok. Here you go.”

He handed me a $10 bill. Thinking that this was just a mistake, that maybe he meant to give me a $20, I said:

Me: “This is a $10 bill.”

Him: “Yeah, I know.”

Me: “The total is $12.69.”

Him: “I gave you a 10. That’s enough.”

Me: “I need $2.69 more. The total is $12.69.”

Him: (annoyed) “It’s all there! I gave you a 10!”

Me: “No. I need $2.69 more.”

Him: “I gave you a 10!”

Me: “I know. The total is $12.69! I need another $2.69!”

This situation kept on going for a good four or five minutes, when something really wrong happened. I just had him on the verge of giving me a $50 bill, when a manager changed the price to make it less than $10. After I told the customer that, he said:

Him: “Darn kids don’t know how to do math these days.”

I suppose the moral of the story is act dumb, even if you aren’t, and rewards will follow.

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